On a warm summer afternoon, the rusling wind and the rushing river is all I could hear as I walked along the beat path, going nowhere in particular. I could smell the lillies in the air, something I’ve never noticed before, in the hundreds of times I’ve gone through here. I wanted to stop for a second, breathe in, before I move on. But I kept on, strolling away in a rush to get to nowhere.
I heard the songbirds in the distance, singing for me to listen. And the dogs, waiting for me to play with them. But I didn’t stop. I kept moving. This path was taking me somewhere I’ve never gone to in a long time. And I wanted to know where I was going to. I saw a market out of the corner of my eye and I stopped. Bustling with colorful items on offer, it was filled with happy people and children. Perhaps, it reminded me for a moment of what I’m trying to walk towards. But I kept going because the thought of what I might find at the end of my journey seemed more alluring than finding happiness in a grocery store.
A cat eyed me closely as I walked past it. It had this beautiful eyes that reminded me of something, a black spot swimming in an abundance of honey surrounded by bright turquoise with a ring of blue finishing it. I could feel those eyes boring down into me as I closed mine. I shook it off and kept going towards a destination I don’t yet know. That’s when something hit me. I had walked for miles and I hadn’t even realised it.
I saw an empty bus stop down the road and sat down there rubbing my palms together. I could feel the sweat dripping from my temples under the warm weather. I wiped it off and sat back enjoying the breeze. I began to drift away, my eyes gently closing and my arms resting on my lap.
I knew then, everything about that journey. The cat we chased down the alley and the market we burst into, laughing our hearts out. I could remember the rushing Avon in the backdrop as I said goodbye to you that night. And the lillies in the air, the time I stormed out of your place when you refused to see me. Most of it all, I could remember those eyes staring down into me like it was only yesterday. And the same empty bus stop where we spent hours sitting in, talking life away like it didn’t matter, feeling each moment as it drifted away from our grasp as we bonded. And we got yanked apart. By destiny.
It was a long walk for me getting home that day, an empty home I hated getting back to. But, I’ll keep living in the hope that someday, it would all comeback to me. That someday, I don’t have to close my eyes to see yours.
This is something from deep within. I could barely find the words to say it. Even then, what I said is nowhere to close what it really way. It’s ironic though, words are all we got yet in the exact moment we need them in, they fail us. Yet we keep going back to them.